But we also usually develop some degree of comfort with a new partner soon after we get serious — and that comfort helps lay some of the groundwork for developing a lasting relationship.A 2015 UK survey of 2,000 couples found that those who had long-lasting, successful relationships generally felt comfortable enough around each other to do things like talk about exes or confide about health concerns.The idea of breaking up with them upsets you not because you'd be lonely, or because you'd feel like you weren't worthwhile, but because your life is happier for having them in it.How To Tell You Might Be In The Wrong Relationship: Research Dr.Washington Post advice columnist Carolyn Hax called this intimacy "feel[ing] safe enough together to be your honest selves."How To Tell You Might Be In The Wrong Relationship: If you've been dating seriously for months and still feel so anxious you need to re-write all your texts five times before you send them, or feel afraid of making an off-the-cuff remark or silly joke to your partner because you fear they may not like it, it might not be just because they still give you butterflies — you might just be wrong for each other, and that's why you can't relax.If the idea of being your true self around your partner fills you with anxiety well after the "getting to know you" period, you may want to investigate why.
A lot of the time, the fact that you were a bad match only becomes clear long after you've split up, when you're trying to puzzle out what happened.
Trying to build a life together with someone who doesn't understand your jokes, your values, why you're obsessed with your job or why you love your collection of vintage Pokemon figurines can be really difficult.
If you're making it work with your cartoon cat and you're happy, good for you!
This seems obvious, but sometimes, it's hard to notice while you're in the middle of it — perhaps you've convinced yourself that you're avoiding your partner because you're stressed out at work, or that your partner is texting you instead of seeing you face-to-face because they have a lot going on right now.
And it's true, even some great relationships go through periods where partners can't see each other as much as they'd like.